My paternal grandfather died the year I was born. Up to now I am not sure whether it was before or after I was born, I like to think it was after so that in my mind I can smile at the thought that we met. The information I know of my grandfather however is as sketchy as my knowing the date he died. the little I do know, came from what my mother told us kids, what my grandmother and aunty mentioned of him too, very little information actually came from my dad, who is his second son.
For years I blamed my dad for this lack of information as some sort of dissappointment to us. I thought he did not see the importance of passing information about family down, geneology, sharing with us his children stories of our ancestors. I thought he was male and just careless.
Now, I see what I think I always knew already. that my grandfather, my dads dad, is a subject too painful for my father to talk about. I know they were very close, and the only details of my grandfathers passing I do know of, was that he had a fatal illness and in his last days he hung in there until he got to say goodbye to my dad (died just after dad arrived)As much as my dad is the rock of our family, through thick and thin, when it comes to my grandad, his emotions are still raw and heavy, even after almost 30 years since he passed.
In some ways I think, thank goodness for blogging and websites,here is an avenue with which I share my thoughts and moments, things that person to person, I know I couldnt do. And as much as its for my friends and perhaps family, a way to reach out to them and share things that I want to but just cant, its for me. yes, I do read my blogs, and perhaps someday (if this blogsite still exists!) my kids will too (oh, when I have more then one kid!LOL)
If only my dad blogged, then maybe I would know much more about my grandad, who is still such a mystery to me...I know he ran a big plantation, he grew apparently some of the biggest avocado in Samoa, he and his sons drank too much beer, and that he was a pilot?? in the airforce /army. Thats really about all I know.
Now, I understand my dads pain, and I wonder, if it will take me that long too. Will I be silent about my sister, because it is too painful to talk about. Will my children know enough about the wonderful and great aunty they will never get to do fun things with? Will they know she would have loved them so much, like her own? its so not fair.
For those who dont know already, I have resigned from work, for many reasons, but mainly, because my gut instinct told me I would be happier if I did. And I am.I did go in for one day last week, I thought I might try a day, but funny how you think youre ready to do something (like go bunjee jump!) and then you get there and the emotions all rush in, and you realise you cant. Will it be like this forever?or for a long time? who knows...
What I do know, are these tough times bring up so many unaswerable questions, so many ifs whys hows...the only thing I do know, is you find strength in your friends and families, and for that I am truly grateful that I have such a strong and loving family, both my own and my in laws. The same goes for my friends, I can not fault any of them. they have all been a constant support and it reminds me why I moved back home.
Sunday, July 05, 2009
Friday, April 17, 2009
Can You Help??
CAN YOU HELP??
So , basically I have given up, given up asking again and again for things we desperately need at our little hospital in the middle of nowhere, which is somewhere to me, and 40,000+ other humble Samoans. I asked last week, last month, last year, and keep getting the yes ok , but years later and the same old broken doors with its broken internals, are opening up to the same frustrated but grateful patients. You look at our hospital and it looks nice, that’s because whoever donated the paintjob did a good job, but forgot to check whether the nicely painted hospital needed anything nice, like the everyday equipment needed to save and improve lives!!
So here it is, my beg and plea...to any good Samaritan out there who might have a pair of these to spare, we would receive anything ever so gratefully, as we at present make do with the very basic of everything, if anything.
We need
- Some good Blood pressure machines (in medical terms sphygomaneter!!)
- preferably with a cuff that is extra large (we only have the flimsy average sized cuffs which do not fit most above average sized Samoans half the time they are broken/leaking/out of batteries) we also need the kids sized cuffs, cos sick kids need their Blood pressure monitored too...here in Savaii we use the “hmm...he looks like his BP is ok” which does not work ALL the time...
We need crutches...desperately
Old ones new ones, broken ones, short ones tall ones. Remember those pairs you saw in your cousin’s uncles closet from when he broke his leg 3 years ago?? If you can spare it, you will change someone’s life here. The number of times I flinch when I see a child with a broken leg or an adult who developed terrible hip pains come into the hospital , and having to tell them to keep their weight off their leg for 6 weeks or longer, for a child, means being completely crippled for 6 weeks- no school, no play no interaction, because we have no crutches to give them that would allow them the freedom of mobility while still keeping their weight off the leg. What happens is kids miss out on school and end up repeating a year, or they are determined to walk on it anyway and then the break never heals, gets more complicated, and lands them in hospital with several sequels of operations to fix what was initially an uncomplicated fracture. The elderly people, become bedridden, develop terrible pressure (bed sores) sores which end up needing surgery they become depressed, they miss out on life and give up... all because we can not offer them crutches.
Its not as if we have NO crutches in Samoa...we just don’t have any in Savaii, and telling people they need to go to Apia and go through the long waitlist of getting measured and awaiting some carpenter somewhere to MAKE the crutches..Is like asking them, them with no paid employee in the family, to move to another country...it does not happen.
We need bandages, anything you can spare of all sizes and shapes...we run on recycled gauze (flimsy cotton) and tape that rips the hairs off your arms and cotton wool- I long for
the days of beautiful clear opsite, and cutifilm, and absorbent and non-absorbent dressings, different ones for boils and cuts and scrapes and sprains...not all the same pathetic gauze, wrapped, tied, stuck on..And fingers crossed things work out.
What’s this little fancy gadget you may ask?? It’s called a saturation monitor, and it gives us vital information on whether a critically ill patient is receiving enough or too much oxygen. It is such a small little device but gives us HUGE bits of information. Savaii has none, Apia has some...but
one would be all we needed, one small leap for man (the Savaii man) one HUGE leap for mankind (the Savaii kind) if you know a GP or work at a hospital that might be getting new ones and tossing old ones...please think of us...it would make a huge difference, to that relative of yours when they come in with Pneumonia, asthma, heart problems, and more....
Curtains, old ones new ones, ones made out of old sheets, tablecloths whatever, our cubicles and even some toilets (!!) have NO PRIVACY...someone last year nicely decided to donate and put up some curtain RACKS...so they are their in place waiting to be used..But oddly enough...no curtains...can you help?? Do you like to sew?? It isn’t until you are a patient and realise how hugely uncomfortable it is to have 30 other patients see everything you do, including using a urinal by your bed if you cant for whatever reason make it to the bathroom, get a sponge bath and wounds on your bum dressed twice a day in front of huge audiences, that you will know the extent of gratitude one would have for a simple curtain, walling them off from the prying eyes of the public, especially when you’re not feeling your best to begin with .
On a brighter note, do you have any of these lying around??
Yes, books, kiddies books, I dream a dream, that dream is the day our little hospital has something to offer our paeds (kids) wing. These kids, sick and irritable come to the hospital and spend days to weeks, missing out on school, and the social privileges and luxuries of being children, they spend their days staring at the walls, pulling their hair out and begging their paren
ts to go home. It breaks my heart, and 1 time out of 2, parents will abscond with their children, simply because they can not bare to stay here with us. I am sure if the ward was a little friendlier with a few books to make up for missing out on school and for past time, life in the hospital would be sooo much different for them. While we are on that subject I may as well mention that a few toys wouldn’t go amiss as well!!
And if I’m mentioning books, I might as well mention that we have no where to PUT the books- and toys, and if you could spare a bookshelf – that one that’s been sitting in the garage for years, we would treasure it like it were worth its weight in GOLD!
Anything that you might be able to help our little hospital with would be hugely appreciated, and we would be grateful for years to come. People often forget about the little hospital in Savaii...You walk into the one in Apia and the kids ward has a Ronald McDonald feel and toys and pretty pictures and TV and books...its like a hospital in Auckland, we have nothing, nada, gloomy stale walls, no ventilation (fans) or curtains or even a hot water kettle for the patients...we might as well have been a few docs nurses bits and bobs lumped up in a white box...so, if you can help...please let me know...Thanks.
So , basically I have given up, given up asking again and again for things we desperately need at our little hospital in the middle of nowhere, which is somewhere to me, and 40,000+ other humble Samoans. I asked last week, last month, last year, and keep getting the yes ok , but years later and the same old broken doors with its broken internals, are opening up to the same frustrated but grateful patients. You look at our hospital and it looks nice, that’s because whoever donated the paintjob did a good job, but forgot to check whether the nicely painted hospital needed anything nice, like the everyday equipment needed to save and improve lives!!
So here it is, my beg and plea...to any good Samaritan out there who might have a pair of these to spare, we would receive anything ever so gratefully, as we at present make do with the very basic of everything, if anything.
We need
- Some good Blood pressure machines (in medical terms sphygomaneter!!)
- preferably with a cuff that is extra large (we only have the flimsy average sized cuffs which do not fit most above average sized Samoans half the time they are broken/leaking/out of batteries) we also need the kids sized cuffs, cos sick kids need their Blood pressure monitored too...here in Savaii we use the “hmm...he looks like his BP is ok” which does not work ALL the time...
We need crutches...desperately
Old ones new ones, broken ones, short ones tall ones. Remember those pairs you saw in your cousin’s uncles closet from when he broke his leg 3 years ago?? If you can spare it, you will change someone’s life here. The number of times I flinch when I see a child with a broken leg or an adult who developed terrible hip pains come into the hospital , and having to tell them to keep their weight off their leg for 6 weeks or longer, for a child, means being completely crippled for 6 weeks- no school, no play no interaction, because we have no crutches to give them that would allow them the freedom of mobility while still keeping their weight off the leg. What happens is kids miss out on school and end up repeating a year, or they are determined to walk on it anyway and then the break never heals, gets more complicated, and lands them in hospital with several sequels of operations to fix what was initially an uncomplicated fracture. The elderly people, become bedridden, develop terrible pressure (bed sores) sores which end up needing surgery they become depressed, they miss out on life and give up... all because we can not offer them crutches.
Its not as if we have NO crutches in Samoa...we just don’t have any in Savaii, and telling people they need to go to Apia and go through the long waitlist of getting measured and awaiting some carpenter somewhere to MAKE the crutches..Is like asking them, them with no paid employee in the family, to move to another country...it does not happen.
We need bandages, anything you can spare of all sizes and shapes...we run on recycled gauze (flimsy cotton) and tape that rips the hairs off your arms and cotton wool- I long for
the days of beautiful clear opsite, and cutifilm, and absorbent and non-absorbent dressings, different ones for boils and cuts and scrapes and sprains...not all the same pathetic gauze, wrapped, tied, stuck on..And fingers crossed things work out.
What’s this little fancy gadget you may ask?? It’s called a saturation monitor, and it gives us vital information on whether a critically ill patient is receiving enough or too much oxygen. It is such a small little device but gives us HUGE bits of information. Savaii has none, Apia has some...but
one would be all we needed, one small leap for man (the Savaii man) one HUGE leap for mankind (the Savaii kind) if you know a GP or work at a hospital that might be getting new ones and tossing old ones...please think of us...it would make a huge difference, to that relative of yours when they come in with Pneumonia, asthma, heart problems, and more....
Curtains, old ones new ones, ones made out of old sheets, tablecloths whatever, our cubicles and even some toilets (!!) have NO PRIVACY...someone last year nicely decided to donate and put up some curtain RACKS...so they are their in place waiting to be used..But oddly enough...no curtains...can you help?? Do you like to sew?? It isn’t until you are a patient and realise how hugely uncomfortable it is to have 30 other patients see everything you do, including using a urinal by your bed if you cant for whatever reason make it to the bathroom, get a sponge bath and wounds on your bum dressed twice a day in front of huge audiences, that you will know the extent of gratitude one would have for a simple curtain, walling them off from the prying eyes of the public, especially when you’re not feeling your best to begin with .
On a brighter note, do you have any of these lying around??
Yes, books, kiddies books, I dream a dream, that dream is the day our little hospital has something to offer our paeds (kids) wing. These kids, sick and irritable come to the hospital and spend days to weeks, missing out on school, and the social privileges and luxuries of being children, they spend their days staring at the walls, pulling their hair out and begging their paren
ts to go home. It breaks my heart, and 1 time out of 2, parents will abscond with their children, simply because they can not bare to stay here with us. I am sure if the ward was a little friendlier with a few books to make up for missing out on school and for past time, life in the hospital would be sooo much different for them. While we are on that subject I may as well mention that a few toys wouldn’t go amiss as well!!
And if I’m mentioning books, I might as well mention that we have no where to PUT the books- and toys, and if you could spare a bookshelf – that one that’s been sitting in the garage for years, we would treasure it like it were worth its weight in GOLD!
Anything that you might be able to help our little hospital with would be hugely appreciated, and we would be grateful for years to come. People often forget about the little hospital in Savaii...You walk into the one in Apia and the kids ward has a Ronald McDonald feel and toys and pretty pictures and TV and books...its like a hospital in Auckland, we have nothing, nada, gloomy stale walls, no ventilation (fans) or curtains or even a hot water kettle for the patients...we might as well have been a few docs nurses bits and bobs lumped up in a white box...so, if you can help...please let me know...Thanks.
Thursday, April 09, 2009
babies
Yesterday was a terrible day at work. I came home, feeling numb, my legs somehow seemed to drag behind me and I felt like a zombie. I couldn't’t really think straight, was not sure if i was angry or sad or in shock. The first thing I Did was pick up my baby and hug and kiss her like I had not held her for days even though I had only been away for 4 hours.
Yesterday I left the ward earlier then normal to help out in the ED/Outpatient, and a catastrophe landed on our doorstep. A lifeless infant was rushed in and immediately all hands were on deck. For what seemed like forever we tried to revive this infant,when it arrived, although it had no heart beat or breath sounds, it was still warm, so in my mind, whatever had happened , had happened in the last few minutes which gave me a glimpse of hope.We tried everything we could, EVERYTHING and more. I stood at the head of the resus bed and ventilated and gave orders, get this draw up that...like a rush of adrenaline I was determined that we could save this child. But the statistics are, that 95% of all babies rushed into hospital in a life threatening state or without vitals, are met with death. We can save only 5% of them. I tried, we tried so hard. I did things I had only read about and not even seen done because all else had failed. And still, the gloomy hands of a terrible fate set in and took this child from us. I was annoyed by the pace of everyones movements, in these situations every second counts, but looking back, everyone was rushing around, it just seemed like every second was a minute, and every minute was an hour. An hour of trying, all the while frantic parents, a frantic mother, wailing around us, asking what was happening, distressed. Towards the end, when I knew it wasn’t going to happen. I started crying, I hit myself because I had tried for so long not to. Big useless sook. I blame it on the post pregnancy hormones if there is such a thing. Ever since having a child, all kids are now precious and personal to me.
I couldn't answer the parents wails over what was happening, but when i started crying- not the wailing type cry but a silent tear dropping cry, in the middle of still ventilating they knew what was coming. And my heart broke. Nothing i could say could ease this moment for them. So I stayed silent. It IS so unfair, a parent should NEVER have to see their child die. How does the mind body and SOUL recover from something like this?? I think a small part of you never does.
We still don’t really know what happened, we think it was SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome) look it up if you have children, this is the sole reason my daughter has a flat head! And i wouldn’t have it any other way. People don’t know much about it here, but the word needs to get out because its universal. I try to tell mothers of young babys about it, sleep babys on their backs at least til they are 6 months etc. But the information needs to get out there beyond the confines of the outpatient visiting room. Something Im going to work on. Get a pamphlet out there or something, hopefully people read it.
Ok, soifua
Yesterday I left the ward earlier then normal to help out in the ED/Outpatient, and a catastrophe landed on our doorstep. A lifeless infant was rushed in and immediately all hands were on deck. For what seemed like forever we tried to revive this infant,when it arrived, although it had no heart beat or breath sounds, it was still warm, so in my mind, whatever had happened , had happened in the last few minutes which gave me a glimpse of hope.We tried everything we could, EVERYTHING and more. I stood at the head of the resus bed and ventilated and gave orders, get this draw up that...like a rush of adrenaline I was determined that we could save this child. But the statistics are, that 95% of all babies rushed into hospital in a life threatening state or without vitals, are met with death. We can save only 5% of them. I tried, we tried so hard. I did things I had only read about and not even seen done because all else had failed. And still, the gloomy hands of a terrible fate set in and took this child from us. I was annoyed by the pace of everyones movements, in these situations every second counts, but looking back, everyone was rushing around, it just seemed like every second was a minute, and every minute was an hour. An hour of trying, all the while frantic parents, a frantic mother, wailing around us, asking what was happening, distressed. Towards the end, when I knew it wasn’t going to happen. I started crying, I hit myself because I had tried for so long not to. Big useless sook. I blame it on the post pregnancy hormones if there is such a thing. Ever since having a child, all kids are now precious and personal to me.
I couldn't answer the parents wails over what was happening, but when i started crying- not the wailing type cry but a silent tear dropping cry, in the middle of still ventilating they knew what was coming. And my heart broke. Nothing i could say could ease this moment for them. So I stayed silent. It IS so unfair, a parent should NEVER have to see their child die. How does the mind body and SOUL recover from something like this?? I think a small part of you never does.
We still don’t really know what happened, we think it was SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome) look it up if you have children, this is the sole reason my daughter has a flat head! And i wouldn’t have it any other way. People don’t know much about it here, but the word needs to get out because its universal. I try to tell mothers of young babys about it, sleep babys on their backs at least til they are 6 months etc. But the information needs to get out there beyond the confines of the outpatient visiting room. Something Im going to work on. Get a pamphlet out there or something, hopefully people read it.
Ok, soifua
Friday, March 20, 2009
Im back
From at 2.5 week holiday to auzzie/aukalani. quick trip to take adria to meet her pops (my dad ) in Auzzie, all up auzzie was hot, big but ok. Aukilani was cold, familiar and had too much easily available junk food for my liking!! Im sure as with everyone else, you never have enough $$ to do ALL the shopping that you WANT to do, and had to change our tickets so we could spend extra time with family (not that the 90% of our time that we spent with them was too little!! he he) even still, we still did not manage to meet up with lots more friends and relatives (sorry if you are one of them!! we thought about you!!)
SOOOOOOO, Im back at work. At the hospital, at the hotel...its full on- hosp is same crap different day, challenges me every moment im there. Hotel has been busy with groups of particular organisations and government departments, its amazing how much these guys spend (considering its tax payers money) on food/drinks/bar tabs. Like, the drivers order extra takeaway meals and run up bar tabs, its AMAZING (or is it lack of organisation/control by whoever is organising these trips) working in this industry is a real eye opener for me- seeing how other public servants get to spree. Sometimes i think perhaps, they work hard and only go on a trip like this once in a lifetime so are going all out, but then again these are the same faces that came last year...and the year before, and Im sure we are not the only resort theyve been too.It eggs me cos im a public servant (work for government) and my job has NO perks (apart from the 'satisfaction I get from helping people' yea ok, try to buy a car with that. And i mean no perks, not even a hot water kettle in sight to make a cup of coffee if I really needed one (our staff BORROW kettles from our patients- which I think is BS and keep telling them not to do it- esp the patients who need boiled water like formula fed babies etc)
SO i read a friends blog recently, spelling out her days work, which involved long lunch breaks and hours sitting at a desk trying to think of things to do, and I hear my other pals talk about similar settings at their jobs, and it makes me really wish my job were a little bit easier.
Today, I- saw a woman with metastatic cancer of unknown origin (all that means is we dont know where it started, but shes pretty much doomed cos its everywhere and we cant cut her lungs heart and brain out) who 1) presented once last year with a cough and a funny shadow in xray then was never seen again.2) presented after a year of a a tumour the size of a rugby ball growing out of her left back & failed samoan fofo, after much investigation bar one more to go, had to give her the bad news that it doesnt look good- sux to be me, I was sympathetic as she is young (40s) but so damned irritated by the fact that she sought fofo for so long- i mean, its partly the fofos fault now cause it has delayed her seeking medical advice from us, but no point now in telling them that. its like saying- "its your fault now youre gonna die so there" isnt it?
then, saw an 'angry' asthmatic...yes, angry that shes in hosp again, doesnt want to take her inhalers cause they give her a bad taste on her tongue (thats sometimes what happens when you have poor technique and swallow the powder instead of inhale it) tried to tell her this all while she was looking at me like i was a complete idiot, and then a long whinge about wanting a tablet to 'cure' it (we are not magicians with magic potions you know) and asked if she could see the surgeons to have an 'operation to fix it' - uhm sorry- no can do!-tried to politely explain all this, amindst lots of 'eh!' and "se!" and head shaking, so after a while got a bit fed up and told her off, i mean shes a 40 yr old woman with asthma her whole life, started in NZ- admitted to hospital often there and even got special 1 on 1 education on athma and how to use inhalers...and now shes throwing a hissy fit all becoz she stopped taking her meds and consquently got an attack...eh! thats all i have to say...if you cant help yourself dont think im going to find a way to make it easier for ya!
then, tried to ring apia to arrange a test for a patient of mines- this is how doing this pans out- ring our operator- transfer me to apia..wait-5 mins music , apia operator, can you get me the surgical doctor on call , UHM WE DONT KNOW WHO IT IS... dont you have a roster/list...YES BUT ITS GONE...gone?? GONE LOST NOTHING....ok well can you TF (transfer) to surgery ward please....wait, 5mins music, surg ward, HALO? hi can i speak to the surgical doctor on call...E , KA'ILO FOI PO'O AI....arent you meant to have a list?...E, KA'ILO FO'I PO'O AI UA AVE'ESEA FO'I LE LISI MAI LE LAUPAPA.. ok well can i speak to any of th docs?...E LE'AI MA GISI O I... do you know where they are??...PEI A O LAE O I LE OUTPATIENT...whats the extension for there??...E, KA'ILO, KALI MAI LE LA KOE TRANSFER OE I LE OPERATOR.....then she hung up on me..dooooo dooooo dooooo ringing in my ears
start all over again, cept go thru to outpatient...can i speak to one of the surgical docs....GA O LE ON CALL LE I BUT O LAE PISI.....is he with a patient....UHMM..LAE I KOKOGU LE POKU SA VAAI LAGA MA'I KAILO PO'O KUSI AGA NOTES...well can you ask if he has a moment im calling from savaii...wait ten minutes...HALO???O AI LEA...im calling from savaii, iw as waiting for someone to ask for the surgical doc for me...E , POO AI FOI UA ALU MA KI'A'I LE KALEFONI MA LOU REQUEST!KALI MAI.....wait another 5 minuets...WUI, E , UA LEAI SEISI O IAI...do you know where he would have gone?PEI A LAE ALU I LE THEATRE....whts their extension...E, KA'ILO KALI MAI SE'I TRANSFER OE I LE OPERATOR...then, she hung up on me...doooo doooo doooo ringin in my ear
ring thru to theatre..Halo? HALO...Can i speak to one of the surgical docs...OI , VAAI , VILI LE EXTENSION LEA %&* O LAE GOFO MAI LAKOU KALA ANE O LE KELFONI GA... ring that number, it rings twice, someone pics up and hangs up right away, try again, same things, ring old number back HALO, that number istn working, keeps hanging up..WUI AI FO'II O LE VAEGA GA O LE FIA KALIA SE KELEFONI! HA HA HA...Can you walk over and tell them IM CALLING FROM SAVAII AND HAVE SPENT 45MINUTES BEING TRANSFERED EVERYWHERE JUST TO TALK TO THEM TO DISCUSS A PATIENT...!!!...Wui, kalofae, ia , kali mai le ole a ou alu e fai ai ae fai e omai i i , i lou kelefoni....Thanks...he hung up on me..dooo dooo doooo
it took me an hour to try to get thru and ths is for 1 patient, and there were 3 more that needed 'dsicussion' with apia,grrrr.the system is so flawed its pathetic...such a waste of time all this running around with people who dont know where people are or how to transfer calls or how to get ahold of people its ridiculous, what if it was a real emergency that i needed specialist advice one??ia, survival loa of the fittest!!
eh, all this komumuing is giving me a headache, so out of all of that what i really want, is for someome to train whoever has to work with a phone that makes transfers how to TRANSFER a call and not hang up pon ya! soooo annoying!
ia, dats all fa laia!
SOOOOOOO, Im back at work. At the hospital, at the hotel...its full on- hosp is same crap different day, challenges me every moment im there. Hotel has been busy with groups of particular organisations and government departments, its amazing how much these guys spend (considering its tax payers money) on food/drinks/bar tabs. Like, the drivers order extra takeaway meals and run up bar tabs, its AMAZING (or is it lack of organisation/control by whoever is organising these trips) working in this industry is a real eye opener for me- seeing how other public servants get to spree. Sometimes i think perhaps, they work hard and only go on a trip like this once in a lifetime so are going all out, but then again these are the same faces that came last year...and the year before, and Im sure we are not the only resort theyve been too.It eggs me cos im a public servant (work for government) and my job has NO perks (apart from the 'satisfaction I get from helping people' yea ok, try to buy a car with that. And i mean no perks, not even a hot water kettle in sight to make a cup of coffee if I really needed one (our staff BORROW kettles from our patients- which I think is BS and keep telling them not to do it- esp the patients who need boiled water like formula fed babies etc)
SO i read a friends blog recently, spelling out her days work, which involved long lunch breaks and hours sitting at a desk trying to think of things to do, and I hear my other pals talk about similar settings at their jobs, and it makes me really wish my job were a little bit easier.
Today, I- saw a woman with metastatic cancer of unknown origin (all that means is we dont know where it started, but shes pretty much doomed cos its everywhere and we cant cut her lungs heart and brain out) who 1) presented once last year with a cough and a funny shadow in xray then was never seen again.2) presented after a year of a a tumour the size of a rugby ball growing out of her left back & failed samoan fofo, after much investigation bar one more to go, had to give her the bad news that it doesnt look good- sux to be me, I was sympathetic as she is young (40s) but so damned irritated by the fact that she sought fofo for so long- i mean, its partly the fofos fault now cause it has delayed her seeking medical advice from us, but no point now in telling them that. its like saying- "its your fault now youre gonna die so there" isnt it?
then, saw an 'angry' asthmatic...yes, angry that shes in hosp again, doesnt want to take her inhalers cause they give her a bad taste on her tongue (thats sometimes what happens when you have poor technique and swallow the powder instead of inhale it) tried to tell her this all while she was looking at me like i was a complete idiot, and then a long whinge about wanting a tablet to 'cure' it (we are not magicians with magic potions you know) and asked if she could see the surgeons to have an 'operation to fix it' - uhm sorry- no can do!-tried to politely explain all this, amindst lots of 'eh!' and "se!" and head shaking, so after a while got a bit fed up and told her off, i mean shes a 40 yr old woman with asthma her whole life, started in NZ- admitted to hospital often there and even got special 1 on 1 education on athma and how to use inhalers...and now shes throwing a hissy fit all becoz she stopped taking her meds and consquently got an attack...eh! thats all i have to say...if you cant help yourself dont think im going to find a way to make it easier for ya!
then, tried to ring apia to arrange a test for a patient of mines- this is how doing this pans out- ring our operator- transfer me to apia..wait-5 mins music , apia operator, can you get me the surgical doctor on call , UHM WE DONT KNOW WHO IT IS... dont you have a roster/list...YES BUT ITS GONE...gone?? GONE LOST NOTHING....ok well can you TF (transfer) to surgery ward please....wait, 5mins music, surg ward, HALO? hi can i speak to the surgical doctor on call...E , KA'ILO FOI PO'O AI....arent you meant to have a list?...E, KA'ILO FO'I PO'O AI UA AVE'ESEA FO'I LE LISI MAI LE LAUPAPA.. ok well can i speak to any of th docs?...E LE'AI MA GISI O I... do you know where they are??...PEI A O LAE O I LE OUTPATIENT...whats the extension for there??...E, KA'ILO, KALI MAI LE LA KOE TRANSFER OE I LE OPERATOR.....then she hung up on me..dooooo dooooo dooooo ringing in my ears
start all over again, cept go thru to outpatient...can i speak to one of the surgical docs....GA O LE ON CALL LE I BUT O LAE PISI.....is he with a patient....UHMM..LAE I KOKOGU LE POKU SA VAAI LAGA MA'I KAILO PO'O KUSI AGA NOTES...well can you ask if he has a moment im calling from savaii...wait ten minutes...HALO???O AI LEA...im calling from savaii, iw as waiting for someone to ask for the surgical doc for me...E , POO AI FOI UA ALU MA KI'A'I LE KALEFONI MA LOU REQUEST!KALI MAI.....wait another 5 minuets...WUI, E , UA LEAI SEISI O IAI...do you know where he would have gone?PEI A LAE ALU I LE THEATRE....whts their extension...E, KA'ILO KALI MAI SE'I TRANSFER OE I LE OPERATOR...then, she hung up on me...doooo doooo doooo ringin in my ear
ring thru to theatre..Halo? HALO...Can i speak to one of the surgical docs...OI , VAAI , VILI LE EXTENSION LEA %&* O LAE GOFO MAI LAKOU KALA ANE O LE KELFONI GA... ring that number, it rings twice, someone pics up and hangs up right away, try again, same things, ring old number back HALO, that number istn working, keeps hanging up..WUI AI FO'II O LE VAEGA GA O LE FIA KALIA SE KELEFONI! HA HA HA...Can you walk over and tell them IM CALLING FROM SAVAII AND HAVE SPENT 45MINUTES BEING TRANSFERED EVERYWHERE JUST TO TALK TO THEM TO DISCUSS A PATIENT...!!!...Wui, kalofae, ia , kali mai le ole a ou alu e fai ai ae fai e omai i i , i lou kelefoni....Thanks...he hung up on me..dooo dooo doooo
it took me an hour to try to get thru and ths is for 1 patient, and there were 3 more that needed 'dsicussion' with apia,grrrr.the system is so flawed its pathetic...such a waste of time all this running around with people who dont know where people are or how to transfer calls or how to get ahold of people its ridiculous, what if it was a real emergency that i needed specialist advice one??ia, survival loa of the fittest!!
eh, all this komumuing is giving me a headache, so out of all of that what i really want, is for someome to train whoever has to work with a phone that makes transfers how to TRANSFER a call and not hang up pon ya! soooo annoying!
ia, dats all fa laia!
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